


Mini Drabble Collection

by CuriosityRedux



Category: How to Train Your Dragon (Movies)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-28
Updated: 2018-12-04
Packaged: 2019-09-01 17:01:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 35
Words: 11,841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16769242
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CuriosityRedux/pseuds/CuriosityRedux
Summary: A series of super short fics, usually five hundred words or less. Everything from humor to angst and rating from general audiences to explicit.





	1. Chapter 1

“If he’s anything like Snotlout, I’m not interested.” That’s what she’d said when Ruffnut had suggested a date with her boyfriend’s cousin. Snotlout was a classic early-peaker, short and stocky and more suited for college football than he was for the coaching job he’d fallen into after graduation. He spoke loudly, crudely, and bragged nonstop about his supposed sexual prowess. A relation of his sounded like the exact opposite of anything she’d find remotely dateable. 

But Tuffnut had been the one to speak in the guy’s favor. “He’s not like Snotlout,” he assured her. “He’s… tall.”

“Skinny,” Snotlout muttered.

“Kind of a nerd.” Ruffnut added. “He’s got a bum leg and lives with his cat. But he’s pretty cool once you get to know him.”

It was hardly enticing. A geek with a limp and a cat. But it had been something of a long dry spell since Astrid’s last relationship, and she was willing to lower her expectations a smidge if it meant imprinting a kiss belonging to anyone but Eret against her mouth. She was tired of licking her lips and tasting a bitter breakup. So she sighed and told Ruffnut to go ahead and set it up.

She’d told him she’d be in a black dress and red shoes. Those heels were currently tucked against one of the rungs of the barstool she sat on. Taking a sip of her drink, she dragged her gaze over the room and tried to calm the twisting of nerves in her stomach. She was still early, but it was eeking close to seven. She’d be humiliated if she got stood up by a guy named _Hiccup_.

Her eyes caught a flash of light near the door. A reflection, it would seem, from a motorcycle helmet. The guy attached to the helmet combed long fingers through hair that looked a little too brown to be copper and paused in the bar’s entrance. Astrid felt her heart squeeze, and a thrill ran down her spine. He was leather and beat up jeans, a white button-down peeking out beneath his jacket’s collar. Tall and mouthwatering, broad shoulders despite a slender build. She couldn’t tell what color his eyes were from where she sat, but she could see the way his tongue darted out to wet his lower lip, and she tensed. 

Astrid thought she was a nice girl. A generally kind person. But gods help her if she wasn’t about to forget all about Snotlout’s nerdy cousin and beg this stranger for a ride… or two.

Her staring caught his attention. He blinked for a second, and then flashed her a grin that was crooked and a little goofy, but _definitely_ charming. Her heart fluttered, breath catching as he wove through the crowd to walk directly towards her. 

_Hiccup who?_

“Hi,” he greeted, shoving his hands in his pockets with something like shyness. She wanted to lick him. “Are you Astrid?”

The sound of her name took her aback. She blinked, pulling away just slightly and narrowing her eyes. “Yes. Have we met?”

The stranger pointed at himself. “No, sorry. Hiccup.”

Oh. 

_Oh._


	2. Chapter 2

“I’m going to wake him,” Valka murmured with concern, pushing back her daughter-in-law’s sweaty bangs. She began to pull away, to stand, but Astrid’s hand on her forearm stopped her. 

“Nn-nh,” she gritted through her wince. The younger woman’s body curled around her pregnant belly, tight and tense and trembling. Her fingers were tight on her arm, digging like claws for a few long moments. Then the contraction passed and Astrid slumped wearily against Valka’s shoulder. “He got in late. He’s only been asleep a couple of hours.”

Sitting back down, she gave the girl a sympathetic smile. “Yer about ta be plenty more exhausted than he is,” she warned. “When are yeh planning on tellin’ him? After someone hands him the babe?”

The glance she was was given was withering. “He’ll just be standing around worrying. Let him rest a couple hours.”

With a light snort, Valka adjusted her chair so she could rub her daughter’s back. “How can there be so much stubbornness in one marriage?”

It wasn’t unusual to arrive at her children’s house early in the morning and find Astrid awake before Hiccup, especially given how poorly she’d been sleeping the past few weeks. But usually she was up and around doing housework or feeding the dragons. This time, she’d walked in to find her son’s wife clenching the arms of what used to be Stoick’s sitting chair and nearly biting her lip off in pain.

“It’s to make sure Hiccup listens to _somebody_ ,” Astrid joked tiredly. 

“Who do _you_ listen to, then?” she quipped back. 

With a shake of her head, the blonde sighed and covered her face with her hands. “I don’t have time to have a baby today. We were supposed to have another couple weeks.”

“Babes come when they please,” Valka murmured. She knew better than anyone. Smoothing her palm between Astrid’s shoulder blades, she tried not to think of that old panic. The fear for her grandchild that had started to set in the minute Astrid began showing. 

The girl breathed a soft laugh. She started a teasing comment about her pregnancy but was cut off halfway through. Whimpering through a clenched jaw, she swallowed hard and squeezed her eyes shut. Her hand found Valka’s and held it tight. 

“Shhshhshh,” she whispered, sitting forward so Astrid could lean into her. “Don’t hold yer breath. It’ll just be a minute. We’ll go walking after the sun rises.”

She gasped for air. “Don’t leave, okay? Stay until Hiccup’s awake?”

Valka couldn’t smother the smile that rose to the surface. How odd that a few years prior, she’d been sure she’d never see her son’s face again. Now his wife had her fingers wrapped tightly around hers, and she’d be there to hear her grandson or grandaughter’s first cries. Things hadn’t always been easy between her and Astrid, but the hard grip on her hand spoke volumes. 

“I’m staying,” she promised– promised her, promised him, promised the little life they’d made. “I won’t ever leave.”


	3. Chapter 3

Hiccup’s mouth went dry at the sight of his wife in a dress he’d never seen before. His heart skipped a beat or two as his eyes skimmed down the sillky red fabric, the deep vee of her neckline, the curls of scarlet against her pale thighs. He felt his hands twitching, his skin warming. Watching her press a strand of glittering silver into her earlobe, he stared longingly and stupidly.

Three months was a long time to go without sex.

Hiccup adored his new son, of course. His entire world had been uprooted, and gravity had shifted to pull him inescapably towards a pair of tiny, drool-covered hands. But having a little one in the house wasn’t just exhausting– it made the mother of his child extremely unwilling to part from the infant. And it was unsurprisingly difficult to try and stir a woman’s desires while her baby slept beside her.

But Hiccup had a February birthday. And it was Valentine’s weekend. The odds were in his favor.

“If Gobber doesn’t get here soon, you’re not going to make it to the restaurant,” he growled, taking a step forward and pulling her away from the mirror so he could tuck her against his body. His hands explored her waist, her hips, all still softened from pregnancy. She smiled mischievously but didn’t reply, still fixing her earrings. Until he reached higher, fingers peeling fabric away from the soft mounds of her breasts.

“Hiccup, don’t,” she scolded, twisting out of his arms. “You’ll make them leak. And this is a _good_ bra.”

He groaned, looking over his shoulder towards his son’s cradle. “You get to have all the fun,” he muttered. Sighing, he reached into his suit jacket, fishing for his phone. He’d have to direct his thoughts away from the echoes of _good bra… good bra…_ if he wanted to get out of the house without molesting his wife. "Where _is_ Gobber, anyways? He was supposed to be here twenty minutes ago.“

His phone clicked to life as he unlocked it. After clicking on his notifications and opening his messages, Hiccup froze. 

Oh no. Oh no no no no no.

"What?” Astrid noticed his stunned demeanor immediately. “What’s wrong? Is everything okay?”

“No.” His voice was as dead as his silky red dreams. “Everything is most definitely _not_ okay.”


	4. Chapter 4

“I’m so scared.”

Hiccup looks up. His wife has blood smeared on her forehead, her lower lip split and bruised. Her arms are wrapped around herself, and she won’t meet his gaze. She keeps glancing nervously at the pallets around them, making sure the exhausted and wounded Berkians still breathe.

He goes back to petting the Night Fury sprawled between them, smoothing his hand over the dragon’s wheezing chest. “The caves’ll hold. The Burglars will come, we just have to trust them.”

“I don’t,” she whispers. Her voice cracks as she says it. “They were supposed to be here yesterday. We should have heard something by now.” Her hard swallow sounds loud in the cold dragon stables. “The reinforcements can’t take much more, and they’ve got our dragons. We’re holed up like mice waiting to die.” In the dark, tears glitter on her cheeks. “I’m sorry. I’m supposed to be the optimist. But I’m scared, Hiccup. I’m so scared.”

He clenches his jaw. For a second, he recalls their wedding day, remembers vowing to protect her and keep her from harm. She’s a warrior. They always knew he couldn’t keep her from the fight, even if he tried. But this is different. This feels like he’s failed.

He reaches over Toothless’ too-still body and pries her fingers away so he can hold her hand in his. Throat tight, he remembers being a boy on a cliff– more than once– afraid and unsure he’d live to see another day. There were too many times he needed her to reassure him, needed her faith. Needed her encouragement so he could make out the light of hope in a black, bleak place. He’s depended on her too long. Made her stop believing in him.

He feels the blisters on the inside of her thumb from swinging an axe in a battle that stretched too long. She sniffs, and he holds her hand a little tighter.

“Then trust me,” he presses. She gasps a quiet sob, making someone lift their head in the darkness and look their way. “I’m your chief and your husband. No matter what happens in the morning, I’m going to be right in front of you.”

“That’s what I’m afraid of.” Her watery voice echoes off the cold stone walls.

“Don’t give up on me yet.” Hiccup reaches up to push strands of hair away from her wet face. “You made a vow to depend on me, so depend on me, Astrid.”

She nods. Whoever they woke lays their head back down. After a moment, she sniffs again. Dries her tears on her forearm.

“You’re not scared?” she asks a little more steadily.

He leans forward and presses a firm kiss to her crown. “Not for me.”


	5. Chapter 5

She finds him later. Sitting on the roof, arms folded atop his knees and gaze lifted to the image of his father carved in the mountain side. It takes some climbing, but she manages to make her way up and navigate the shingles. He stretches his legs out and wraps his arm around her when she tentatively steps to the edge and sits at his side.

For a minute, they’re quiet. Then he says, “I’m sorry for yelling.”

Astrid slowly nods, looking up at Stoick’s memorial. She leans back on her hands. “I picked the honey ale for the reception. That’ll be your punishment.”

The corner of his mouth twitches upwards. Her sweet tooth is insatiable. “I’ll manage somehow.”

Dragons fly overhead, some playing and chirping, while others accompany Vikings with their daily duties. A passing villager on a Gronkle waves, and they both lift their hands to return the gesture. He should get back to work, before somebody complains.

“You can’t do everything,” she tells him, as if reading his mind. Turning her head, she looks him up and down before plucking a tuft of wool from his mantle and letting it catch the breeze. “I can ask your mom for help with some of the wedding plans.”

“You don’t want to, though.” Hiccup lifts a wry brow at her.

She shrugs. “I’d like my soon-to-be husband’s input.” Leaning in, she shifts her gaze back to the splay of the village. “But I’d also like it to be his pleasure, not his pressure.”

The echo of someone shouting warbles from the dock. They let the sounds of the island clatter around him. He turns to chew on her shirt, like a Terror demanding attention. She laughs and tilts her head to lose a kiss in his hair.

“You are my pleasure,” he mumbles with her sleeve between his teeth. Then, letting go, he straightens and gives her a little smile. “Don’t ask Mom. I’ll write the letter to Trader Johan in the morning.”

Blue eyes narrowing, she stares at him fondly. “Whatever you say, chief.”


	6. Chapter 6

Before he really has the chance to introduce himself, she’s got him by the hand and she’s pulling him through the crowd. Her hair’s loose, which he’s not sure he’s ever seen, and the ringing of jingling gold bracelets makes a raucous sort of music as she runs. He looks back at Snotlout and Ruffnut, but he’s already lost them in the busy foot traffic.

“Hi?” he calls after her as she drags him along, grinning and hissing for him to hurry. “Are we not–?”

“It’s a set-up!” she shouts back, blonde strands falling in her face. Groups part for her, jumping out of their way as they rush through.

Hiccup nearly trips over his prosthesis. They run past the Ferris wheel, the petting zoo, the cotton candy stand and more than one person staring at them in bafflement. He’s never been able to work up the courage to talk to her– Astrid Hofferson, student class president and homecoming queen. She sits two seats in front of him, with an ever-present braid and knee-length skirts. She’s beautiful and charming and letters every sport available.

Which means she’s way out of his league, of course. But this isn’t the girl from English Lit. This is a tornado in motorcycle boots and a crop top, the pinch of rings holding his hand. He follows, slack jawed and full of wonder, willing to chase this stranger to the end of this tacky summer carnival.

Finally, she must think they’re safe, because she pulls him into the shadows between two thrill rides. Her cheeks are pink and she’s laughing with every heavy exhale. “I’m pretty sure we lost them,” she tells him, scanning the crowd that shuffles by. “He’s been trying to get her alone for weeks.”

He knows that much about his cousin. It was the entire reason he’d agreed to come along, because Snotlout can’t get Ruffnut to give him the time of day. But she’d agreed to come with a friend that night. There was no way he could’ve known that friend would be Astrid.

“I’m Hiccup,” he finally manages to pant, “Hiccup Haddock.”

She flicks eyes the color of the sky above back at him. “I know who you are,” she scoffs and smiles. The sound of screaming from the ride next to them almost drowns out her words. “Do you know who I am?”

He can only stare. She still hasn’t let go of his hand. “I thought I did.”


	7. Chapter 7

“There’s no way,” he muttered to himself as the phone rang in his ear. His thumb smoothed out a crease in the old sheet of notebook paper. The Hoffersons were a military family. There was no possible way the number scribbled in purple marker still worked. 

But somehow, impossibly, someone answered. “Hello?”

“Uh, hi–” he stammered, sitting up as if the voice on the other side could see him slouched over the box in his attic. “I was trying– is this the Hofferson residence, by chance?”

“It is,” the woman replied pleasantly. “How can I help you?”

Hiccup laughed breathlessly, shaking his head and running a hand through his hair. “Hi! Wow. This is Hiccup Haddock. I used to go to school with Astrid back when you guys lived in Berk.”

“Hiccup…?” she said uncertainly, but then she brightened. “Hiccup! Stoick’s son! How are you?”

“I’m good, I’m good.” He glanced back down at the paper in his hand. “I was going through some old stuff and found your number. I still can’t believe you answered.” Wetting his lips, he reached in the box and picked up a messily made Best Friends Forever picture frame, featuring a blonde girl with braids and freckles. “You don’t happen to have Astrid’s number, do you? I’d love to give her a call.”

Mrs. Hofferson sounded delighted. “I do, but she’s actually here on Thanksgiving break. Let me grab her!” For a second, he tried to stop her, but she’d already pulled the phone away from her ear and shouted for her daughter. 

For a moment, there was a lot of rustling on the other side of the line, along with the soft tones of feminine voices talking. For some reason, his heart suddenly began hammering in his ribcage. He gripped the picture frame nervously. 

“Hello?”

He felt his stomach flip at the madly familiar voice. “Astrid?”

There was a sharp intake of breath on the other side of the phone. “Hiccup!”

Biting his lip, he grinned. “Yeah.”

“H-how–? What–” For a second, she struggled for words, but then she gasped a quiet laugh. “You remembered. You actually kept your promise.”

Hiccup grinned and set the picture frame down in front of him. “I told you I’d find you.”


	8. Chapter 8

The girl holding her backpack protectively between them smelled like vanilla and sweat. Her panting breaths were warm on his shoulder, and despite the fact that he’d never seen this girl in his life, she had one hand fisted in his shirt to hold him close. The tiny awning was really only big enough for one person, but the way she nearly glued herself to his chest meant they were able to just barely squeeze in two.

“Astrid,” she panted, testing her backpack to see how wet it had gotten in the downpour. “Pre-law. Nice to meet you.”

Hiccup swallowed, heart pounding so loudly he wondered if she could hear. “Hiccup. Physics. Mutual.”

She licked her lips. Wiping her frizzy bangs back, she blinked out at the rain. “I swear I don’t always throw myself at men under awnings.”

“Oh, I do. All the time.” She laughed at his reply, and he let himself smile a little nervously. “It’s okay, I’ve done some pretty desperate things during finals week myself.” She certainly looked as stressed as she sounded– her face was pale, her big blue eyes ringed with dark smudges.

The wind changed, and Astrid hissed as a stream of water poured down her back. She stepped between his legs, pressing so close that her mouth was practically at his shoulder. When she swore under her breath, he could feel the little puff of air tickle his neck. “How long have you been stuck here?”

Longer than he wanted to admit. Puddles and metal legs didn’t get along so well. “Ten minutes, maybe?”

“Huh.” She leaned her forehead against his collarbone, making him swallow hard. Astrid of pre-law clearly had no concept of personal space. “Maybe it’ll let up soon.”

“Maybe,” he answered, though he was doubtful. “I checked the weather before I left the house this morning. Most of it’s supposed to hit later tonight, around nine o'clock. This is just the pre-game. If you don’t have an emergency weather radio, you should probably pick one up after your class. They’re expecting a city-wide blackout.”

He waited a minute for a reply, but none came. Glancing down at her golden crown, he gave the hem of her damp t-shirt a tug. “Astrid?”

He was met by the soft sound of a breathy snore. Hiccup tried to fight his grin as he lifted his gaze back to the storm.

Finals week.


	9. Chapter 9

“How do I know this woman again?” Hiccup stepped over a pile of megablocks on his way to the laundry room, accidentally crunching a piece underfoot and wincing.

“Astrid is Snotlout’s girlfriend’s college roommate,” Fishlegs promptly answered. “You met her at Tuffnut’s barbecue last year.”

“She’s late. She’s late so I’m late.” Hiccup clawed through the dryer for a black sock to match the one he was currently wearing. He held one to the light, squinting.

Damn. Navy.

“Be real, Hiccup. You’re late because you’re terrible at managing time.”

“Be that as it may…” He muttered. “Aha!”

The doorbell rang, and he leaned against the wall as he struggled to hop to the front of the apartment and put on his sock at the same time. The sound of little feet pitter pattered on the hallway floor, and his four year old zoomed past him. “Hayden Haddock, what did I tell you about opening the door for strangers!” he shouted after his son, but it was too late. The boy was already tugging on the handle and staring up at the stranger in question.

Astrid Hofferson was supposedly a brilliant law student who was due to take her bar exam any day. She’d sounded very put together over the phone. But in his doorway, in cut-off shorts and flip flops, she looked more like a high school drop out on her way to the drug store. Her tank top was cut low– he could see the top of her blue bra peeking out. He cringed, instantly regretting allowing his cousin to arrange babysitting plans, but it was too late to go back.

“Hi,” he greeted, a little out of breath. “Hiccup Haddock.”

Astrid tilted her head at the little one at her feet, blonde ponytail swinging. “You must be my charge.” To Hiccup, she grinned and said, “Sorry I’m late. Bus was running behind schedule.”

He tried laughing it off, slipping his feet into his dress shoes. “It’s okay. I’m running behind too. Hayden– go get Toothless and camp out by the TV. I’ll be right there for hugs.”

The four year old nodded, then looked back at Astrid to say, “You can be my girlfriend,” before disappearing down the hall in search of his stuffed dragon.

The girl nodded. “In that case, I should’ve shaved my legs.”

“Don’t worry, he’s more of a boob man,” Hiccup chuckled under his breath, recalling how his son would cuddle close to any woman with breasts as an infant. Then abruptly realizing how inappropriate his comment was, he snapped his head up. “I– I’m sorry, that was– I didn’t mean–”

Astrid just twisted her mouth aside and searched the inside of her cheek with her tongue. She took an insurreptitious glance towards her chest. “Uh-huh.”

Hiccup shook his head and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I– you’re very well-endowed, I wasn’t–”

“You don’t do this often, do you?” She sighed, fixing the strap of her bag over her shoulder. “Leave him?”

He gave her a flat glance, relieved she understood his frazzled state. “No. I don’t.”

She finally stepped into the apartment, patting his shoulder a little rougher than necessary. “Don’t worry, dad of the year. I’m on the job.” Then she strode past him towards the sound of The Lion King. The fringe of her shorts teased the curve of her ass cheeks as she walked.

Hiccup took a deep breath. “Somehow, that’s not exceptionally assuring.”


	10. Chapter 10

“Have you written your speech yet?” his wife asks for the third time. “Or, you know, thought about what you’re going to say? At all?”

“I was thinking of announcing that we’re planning on invading, then resigning from my post as chief. Slipping out the back while chaos erupts.” Pacing in front of the fire, he presses his forehead against the feather-soft hair of his daughter’s crown. She opens her mouth wide in a sleepy yawn and then settles back into her nap.

Astrid appears in the doorway, adjusting her arms inside a gown the color of a sunset. Her glance is withering. “Babe, the banquet’s in two hours. This is the first time all the chieftans will be on one island since before your dad. You’ve _got_ to make a good impression.”

“Shhh,” he whispers, shutting his eyes and shaking his head. “You’re gonna wake her. She can _feel_ your stress.” He turns so that she can see the baby’s angelic face, red-cheeked and chubby and completely at peace. 

“I’m gonna make _you_ feel my stress if you keep this up,” she threatens. It’s not completely hostile, though. There’s a hint of exasperation and exhaustion in her voice. When she speaks again, he can picture her anxiously running a hand through her hair. “Hiccup–”

“Don’t wanna,” he mutters, interrupting her. He can feel Astrid’s gaze on his shoulders as he gently rubs his daughter’s back and holds her a little tighter. “Don’t wanna be chief. Don’t wanna be Dragon Master. Wanna be Dad.”

She sighs. For a moment, they stand in silence as she stares and he bounces their baby. Then her footsteps grow closer and her hand cups his elbow. Leaning over to kiss her daughter, she then frowns and points up at him. “Ten minutes of Dad time. Then speech writing. You can have her back when you’re done.”

Hiccup hides his smile behind a tiny cheek, but he’s sure his wife can still see the crinkling of his eyes. He continues his pacing. “Deal.”


	11. Chapter 11

**Onesies**

“Admit it,” Astrid sighs, burying her hands in the front pockets. “You love it.”

Hiccup frowns down at his fleece-encased leg. “It’s, uh– warm?” With every step he takes, though, his prosthetic foot slides against the soft fabric. “Really… roomy.”

She instantly looks so disappointed by his answer that he scrambles to brighten his reply. “And it’s even black, so I match Toothless!” He attempts a grin, but it feels wooden.

Unfortunately, she knows him too well to be deceived by his pathetic attempts at lying. She closes the space between them and toys with the zipper just below his neck. “It’s okay, babe. You don’t have to like everything I do.” Shrugging, she smiles up at him.

“If it helps, I like how it looks on you.” He tugs on one of her white bunny ears and gathers her close.

Her smile turns devilish, and she raises a brow. “Well, it does have convenient easy access,” she says lowly, and the zipper crackles as she pulls it down.

Well. He could learn to like them.


	12. Chapter 12

Their son had eyes the color of a mountain in the distance. A grayish green that was just a little lighter than his grandmother’s. She pursed her lips against a smile as she watched him stare at the whittled figurines Valka had hung from the ceiling. His arms and legs flailed and squirmed, his tiny fingers reaching and grabbing for the sky. He gurgled and coughed. She hummed a lullaby under her breath, curling her body around his and propping her elbow on the bed.

The door shut quietly downstairs, and Astrid’s mouth stretched upwards at the sound of a prosthetic foot on the floorboards. “Daddy’s home,” she whispered, straightening the infant’s gown around his chest.

The stairs creaked. The handle turned. She nuzzled her son’s nose with her own and heard her husband’s familiar sigh.

He crawled onto the bed and promptly flopped on top of her.

“What are you doing?” she protested through her laughter, twisting under his weight to hold a protective hand over her child. “Are you out of your mind?”

“I’m a dragon,” he growled, tugging at her shirt with his teeth and playfully gnawing at the back of her neck. “I’m sitting on my nest. Keeping my hatchling warm.”

“What does that make me then?” she giggled.

“My mate,” he proclaimed in a deep and serious voice.

“You’re squishing me!” She nudged the baby towards the center of the bed, but her husband’s weight was tugging her towards the edge.

“Oh no! My mate! She’s falling out of the tree!”

“Ahh! Hiccup, I swear on Odin’s ghost, if you let me fall!”

“She’s going down! She can’t get her wings out! She’s not gonna make it!”

“Hicc– EEP!”

They both hit the floor with a thud. Astrid couldn’t contain her bubbling mirth, reaching behind her head to touch the sore spot she’d probably have tomorrow. Hiccup had landed atop her, and he covered her face in an attack of kisses.

On the bed, the baby laughed.


	13. Chapter 13

“It’s really weird, y’know,” Astrid whispered, trying not to speak too loud and disturb the Night Fury making clicking and whirring sounds in her lap. “How he knows.”

Hiccup shrugged with one shoulder, dipping his head to drop what had to be the thousandth kiss on the nape of her neck. “Dragons know stuff we don’t. They’re just… Amazing.” He sighed. Resting in front of the hearth with his wife leaning back against his chest was already a perfect end to a wild day. Sharing it with his best friend was even better.

But tonight, their family was just a little bigger. And that made this moment one he’d remember until he was old and gray.

“He’s been doing that for weeks. I can’t believe I didn’t think of it sooner.” She laid her hand on the Night Fury’s head, stroking the bridge between his brow with her thumb. Toothless hardly seemed to notice, still sniffing and chirruping at her flat belly.

The thrill of nerves and excitement twisted in the young chief’s chest once more. He reached his arm around her to smooth his hand over her abdomen in wonder. “Too busy, I guess.”

Toothless made an annoyed huff and nudged his rider’s hand out of the way.

“Hey, whose baby is this anyways?” Hiccup snorted, prompting his wife’s laughter.

“Ours,” she answered, leaning over and nuzzling the dragon’s head. “All of ours.”


	14. Chapter 14

The skirt is supposed to be this short.”

“Is it? Is it really?” Hiccup made a circle around his half dressed girlfriend, thumb and forefinger rubbing unsurely at his bottom lip. “I don’t know, I think it looks good right there.”

Astrid gave him a flat look, unamused. She still had her hand significantly further down her bare thigh, where she was told the skirt to her flight suit would be ending. Instead, it was hiked up to just barely avoid exposure. If anyone thought to drop into the chief’s workshop, they’d get more of an eyeful than they bargained for. 

Not that she should be here anyways. They both had so much to do, between helping haul in the fish for the evening, fixing the pens in the dragon stables, and discussing land plots for the new building projects. The only reason she’d agreed to this was because he’d insisted she’d want to see the flight suit he’d finally completed. 

“You’ll be wearing tights, won’t you?” Stopping his pacing, Hiccup leaned against his drawing table and grinned, folding his arms over his chest. “Besides, you’ll have so much room to move around.”

She narrowed her gaze, watching as his line of sight climbed up and down her legs. “I’m not sixteen anymore, Hiccup. I can’t keep running around in tiny clothes hoping my leggings don’t show my ass when I bend over.”

If anything, his smile broadened. 

Rolling her eyes, she sighed and stomped forward until they were face to face. “Up here, dragon boy.”

“Are you sure I can’t convince you?” He teased, reaching out and pulling her closer. When his rough hands slid over the scaled skirt and cupped the back of her thighs, the heat of his skin sizzled through her. 

“It has to be longer,” she pressed, raising one brow. Her hands found his sides as she let him slip his knee between hers. “I’m the chief’s… I’ll be your wife. There are certain standards I have to uphold.”

“Well then it’s a good thing it’s not finished yet,” he informed her smartly, voice at a conspiratorial whisper. With a backwards nod, he gestured to the pile of scales and chainmail stacked in a corner of his desk. 

Astrid’s cheeks flushed. “Then why did you tell me to try it on?”

His eyes flashed wickedly in the late evening light. “It seemed like the quickest way to get you undressed.”


	15. Chapter 15

“Run! You said you’d work out with me!” 

“I didn’t realize,” Hiccup gasped between gulps of air, “that your idea of a relaxed workout… included non-stop sprinting… around the island.” 

To be fair, he tried to keep up. And he could easily tap out with the excuse that his prosthesis was rubbing his leg raw– which it was– but the tiniest bit of pride he’d maintained wouldn’t let him quit. 

“This isn’t sprinting!” she insisted, running a literal circle around him. “This is a steady run! Getting your blood pumping! Building your endurance!” She looked, of course, like she was barely out of breath. While he was drenched with sweat, she had a faint glisten on her flushed cheeks. 

“Has anyone ever told you that you have an unhealthy obsession with physical fitness?” Hiccup sputtered to a stop, first bending over with his hands on his knees, and then leaning forward until he was sprawling on the forest floor. 

“Nope!” 

Astrid remained unfazed, continuing her large circles around him. It was a relief that she didn’t try and drag him back up, but he suspected she was used to people having trouble keeping up with her. He knew for a fact that Snotlout had tried more than once to show off his physical prowess and had come away rubber-legged and eating his words.

“Y’know,” he panted, “I don’t think I can remember the last time I saw you miss a morning run.” 

“Well,” she said thoughtfully, braid bouncing. “For so long it was about staying fit for the dragon raids. Making sure I was strong enough and fast enough if I ever came face to face with one.” She paused, and he wondered if she was thinking of Stormfly like he was thinking of Toothless. “Now– now I’m just ready for anything.”

Chest heaving, Hiccup stared up at the grey sky through the trees’ scattered branches. There hadn’t been a raid in a year, ever since the queen was destroyed. It’d been a relief, and the whole village felt the difference. 

Except Astrid, it seemed.

“Do you think you’ll ever stop?” he asked the sky, too exhausted to be embarrassed by his prying. “Running? Training? Preparing?”

Her circles slowed. 

“I don’t know,” she mumbled, almost so quiet he couldn’t hear over the pounding in his ears. “I guess I’ve just always figured I had to be the one to protect everybody. To keep the village safe.”

“Who keeps you safe?”

The sounds of chirping birds and flapping wings in the distance hung between them. Her footsteps trotted around and around and around his head as she jogged.

After what seemed like forever– long enough for him to catch his breath– she slowed to a stop. 

“Lately…” she began, and Hiccup tore his eyes from the treetops to find her hand outstretched to him. “You. So I’m gonna need you to get up and keep running.”


	16. Chapter 16

“This is the fourth time Ruff has begged off kitchen duty.” 

Astrid knew the sound of her husband’s prosthesis on the Great Hall’s floorboards before he even announced himself behind her. 

“I wasn’t aware we were keeping track,” Hiccup responded easily, his voice drifting over the sound of boiling water.

“Well, we are.” Astrid ignored the arms sliding around her waist as she deftly chopped at the ingredients for the village meal. The Great Hall’s kitchen was quiet for once, with most of the Berkians out and about doing their daily duties. “It’s one thing to switch shifts, but she just disappears. And who gets stuck doing it? Me.”

“I thought you liked kitchen duty?” The chief rested his chin on his wife’s shoulder, watching her hands work swiftly through a carrot. “I believe your exact words were, ‘the only chore where I get to use a knife’.”

“I do, but–” She sighed grumpily, shaking her head. The blade scraped across wood as she shepherded diced vegetables to the corner. “She can bring the baby here. She doesn’t have to bail on her responsibilities every time he gets the sniffles.”

The hands at her sides squeezed. For a minute, there was silence between them. 

Hiccup dropped a kiss onto the back of her head, resting his chin there so he could inhale the scent of soap and sweet grass in Astrid’s hair. “This wouldn’t have anything to do with the way you were looking at his chubby little cheeks over dinner last night, would it?”

“No,” Astrid said too quickly. The stacatto snap of the knife was more honest. “And we don’t need a baby right now. There’s too much to do, and I’m already picking up Ruffnut’s slack, and we’re barely through with negotiations with Spack.” Her chopping quickened along with her list of excuses. “Not to mention, we don’t have the energy– I mean you fell asleep in the middle of last week’s council meeting, and I can barely get enough flying time for both Toothless and Stormfly between chores and the A-team and cleaning up whatever the dragons have broken this week. We _can’t_ have a baby right now.”

“Okay.” Hiccup hid a smile in her braids. 

“Okay?” She whipped around, leaving her husband to dodge the knife she still had brandished. “What do you mean _okay_?”

“It’s hard to argue when you’ve provided seven different perfectly good reasons in one breath.” He lifted a brow and slowly pressed down on her hand so that the knifepoint aimed down at the floor. 

“Now _you’re_ keeping track?” Astrid muttered. Scowling, she turned back to the cutting board. Her shoulders were tense as she resumed her work. “It’s just not… prudent.” 

“Nope. Definitely not.” The chief reached around her, filching a bite of carrot before popping it in his mouth. He gave her neck a quick kiss and began striding leisurely away. “If you think of a good reason to go for it, let me know. I’m ready when you are.”

When she whirled around again, the sound of his footsteps were already disappearing down the hall. 


	17. Chapter 17

“If yeh keep making that face, it’ll freeze that way." 

Hiccup blinked up from the parchment in his hand, thumb sliding over the paper that _almost_ smelled like Berk. “Huh? You say something, Gobber?”

With a snort, his mentor shook his head and sighed, flipping his facemask back down to shield his eyes from the sun. The ship creaked and rocked beneath them, but so far as the young chief seemed to be concerned, they were sailing on clouds. “Oh, nothin’. I don’t suppose yeh’ve heard from Astrid, have yeh?”

"Oh— yeah.” He grinned warmly down at the paper. It was stained with blots of ink and her excruciatingly perfect handwriting. “She said Toothless has been trying to crawl in the bed with her.”

“Nothin’ about Berk?”

“Huh?”

“Berk. The island. The village yer in charge of?”

“Oh. Yeah. She says everything’s great.”

Gobber rolled his eyes and settled back into his chair. Newlyweds. 


	18. Chapter 18

**Rufflout**

“Don’t _touch_ me!” she shrieked, shoving him away when his reaching arms attempted to loop around her waist. “You _idiot_.” Her throat felt thick, and her eyes stung with hot tears. 

So he took a step back, his flat expression not changing beneath the layer of dust and grime and blood that dripped from his hairline. Snotlout was quiet for once, and she couldn’t take the strange fluttering of her heart that felt too much like relief and answered prayers. The corner of his mouth tipped upwards, cocky and knowing. It disgusted her.

"I hate you,” she spat, sniffing and wiping her nose against her shirtsleeve. So what if he’d made it back in one piece? So what if Astrid had her arms wrapped around Hiccup like he was a rope in the middle of the ocean? She wasn’t Astrid and he wasn’t Hiccup. And they weren’t even a couple so why should she care that he walked out of that explosion alive?

“It’s okay,” he chuckled, sighing and reaching forward to brush her bangs back. She smacked his hand away. “I’m okay.”

Why should she care, she asked herself again. Then she pulled him forward by the horn of his helmet and shoved her mouth against his.


	19. Chapter 19

“You don’t have to do this.”

“I know.”

“Ah! Seriously. You— you don’t have to _return the favor_ or anything. I wanted to.”

"And _I_ want to do _this_.”

There’s blonde hair tickling his inner thighs. A wet heat slowly sliding down his shaft and pink lips pressing into his flesh. Her cheeks are flushed, and she won’t quite look up at him. She feels shier than she’s acting, he knows. His hand hovers, stunned, over the back of her head. Her tongue laves against the underside of his sensitive head. Her grip tightens nervously at his base. And then she _sucks,_ and he jerks— and he discovers that a new noise has replaced the wind in his ears as his favorite sound. 

It’s the sound of her gagging around his cock.


	20. Chapter 20

“Hiccup!” Astrid squeaked in surprise, a thrill of excitement jolting through her body at the sensation of a warm hand finding her chilled back. The ripped garb she’d worn for the twins’ zombie apocalypse trail left several holes through which the cold October wind could reach. The bark of the tree she’d been pulled behind scraped at her shoulders. 

“Shh,” he whispered, holding a finger smeared with fake blood to his lips. “Zombies don’t talk.”

“There’ll be customers coming soon,” she replied in a lower voice. “Why aren’t you at your mark?”

“Hey, I am the highlight of this attraction.” He pulled away, motioning to the torn and tattered remnants of his left pants-leg. She thought he’d pulled his prosthesis on to sneak away, but now she realized that he was balancing himself against the tree trunk. “I’m allowed to take breaks.”

She rolled her eyes, though it probably went unseen in the shadows. “Hiccup, you have to—” 

“Shhhh.” He leaned in, and his warm body felt so incredible pressing into her icy limbs. His mark was close to the bonfire, warm and cozy, while she was creeping through the woods. When his lips began to kiss a scorching trail down her painted throat, she couldn’t help but sigh at the pleasurable heat. “Zombies. Don’t. Talk.”

Snorting softly, lest someone hear, she slipped her stiff fingers into his beat up denim jacket. “What do they do, then?”

He nibbled against her collarbone. “They _moan_.”


	21. Chapter 21

He’s very aware of his tongue. It feels loose and weird, like it doesn’t quite sit like it should in his mouth, but that’s okay because it’s more fun using that tongue to sloppily suck at her neck. Blonde hair sticks to his lips when he pulls away for air.

He should ask for her name. So far he only knows her as the blonde in the studded leather skirt that gave Snotlout a right hook that made his own jaw hurt. After picking up his cross-eyed cousin off the floor and shoving him towards Tuffnut, Hiccup had shrugged out of his leather jacket and passed it to the blonde. The beer Snot had spilled on her dripped down her front, and her filmy white blouse was sticking to every curve and shadow. Even in the dim light of the bar he could tell she’d forgone a bra that evening.

The beer is growing sticky against her skin now, and he tastes it on her collarbone. He feels his fingers catch on it as he gropes clumsily beneath that sheer, booze-stained top and tests her hard nipples against his thumb. She moans into his mouth. 

She’s probably a Brooklyn or a Harley. Something fierce and strong. But there’s also a little whimpering noise she makes when he rubs his erection against the heat of her panties that makes her sound soft. Maybe a Katie. A Cassidy.

“What’s your name?” he mumbles as she goes for the button of his jeans. He can hardly remember his own, with the way she’s clawing and pressing against his zipper. When she finally works him free and grips him in her small, cool hand, his hips buck involuntarily. The movement is crooked and broad and he can _feel_ the alcohol distorting his control. 

She tugs her panties aside instead of pulling them down. Digs her heel into his ass as she guides his tip along a delicious, intoxicating slickness. “Astrid,” she answers, and then her hips surge forward to take him.


	22. Chapter 22

“I feel ridiculous.” Hiccup muttered, adjusting the mask on his face. “I don’t even have black hair.”

“You have a tuxedo. You have a mask. You’re Tuxedo Mask.” She gave him a small smile over the squirming cat in her arms— Toothless kept trying to bat at the construction paper crescent moon taped to the top of his head. “Besides, it’s Comic Con. Everyone is in costume.”

He grumbled but reached over to scratch his best friend’s ear. “I feel your pain, bud. At least you’re not in a bow tie.”

Rolling her eyes, Astrid looped her arm through his and dragged him along. A couple of other costumed fans wandered around them. “Come on, my Earthly Prince. We’re supporting Fishlegs. Just enjoy it— get in character.”

“Yeah, yeah,” he sighed. They navigated through the crowds, smiling at the people who squealed and crooned at Toothless. Hiccup also noticed— not with a little annoyance— how eyes dropped to watch his girlfriend’s legs as she walked. His prosthesis made soft thuds on the industrial carpet, making him feel out of place and awkward. But she looked like she belonged, with her long blonde pigtails bouncing and glittering.

“What booth is Legs again?” Astrid leaned in to try and see the paper in Hiccup’s hand.

“Uhhh, lemme check.” He scanned the list, but before he could find their friend’s name, she suddenly pulled her arm away.

“There he is!” She gasped. Hiccup found his cat being thrust towards him. Then she was darting across the wide hallway. “Hey, Legs!”

He swallowed hard. Those hot pink boots. That short, pleated skirt. Whenever she moved, he was treated to a flash of her shimmery volleyball shorts.

Hiccup could learn to like the costumes, he decided.


	23. Chapter 23

“Is your heart beating as fast as mine?”

“I dunno, how fast is your heart beating?”

Astrid reached over their laptops, poised back to back on the Haddock’s kitchen table, and grabbed her boyfriend’s hand. She flattened out his fingers with her own and pressed his palm above the anxious hammering in her chest. 

“Jeez, don’t go into cardiac arrest on me.” Hiccup gave her a teasing half smile and drew his arm back. He checked the time. “T-minus two minutes.”

She exhaled slowly, rolling her shoulders and wetting her lips. “Oh gods, I’m so nervous.”

“Don’t be,” he told her, giving her knee a squeeze beneath the table. “You’re gonna get in. I’m gonna get in. We’re going together.”

“ _You’re_ going to get in because _you_ have a freaky math brain,” she accused with narrowed eyes. “You can not pay attention to a single thing in physics and still get a better score than me on the test.”

Shrugging, Hiccup leaned back in his chair. “You’re better than me at the writing portion.”

“Oh gods,” she groaned. “Sixty seconds.” Astrid grabbed the hand resting on her leg. “Feel my palms— they’re so sweaty.”

“Ew, they are.” He pretended to gag and wiped the dampness off on his jeans. Then he took her face and pulled it close. “Relax. It will be fine. Even if you don’t get in, or even if I don’t get in, we’re gonna be okay. Okay?”

She nodded, turning to kiss the crook of his thumb and forefinger. “You’re right.”

His gaze slid over to his phone and then back over to her nervous blue eyes. “It’s nine am,” he announced, taking a deep breath. “Ready?”

Her ponytail bounced as she nodded.

“Okay, together,” he sighed, pulling up the log-in screen and entering his password. The sound of clacking keyboards filled the kitchen. “Three?”

“Two.” Her teeth buried in her bottom lip.

He kept his eyes on her.

“One.”


	24. Chapter 24

“These are disgusting.” Astrid wrinkled her nose, picking another tiny heart from Hiccup’s open palm.

“Yeahhh,” he agreed, squinting to read the fading red type on a pale green candy. Then he held it out to her. “Here. The poetry of my heart.”

Accepting it, she snorted at the message. “U R COOL? Thanks, babe. Consider me swept off my feet.” Still, she placed the heart on her tongue and cringed at the bitter sweet chalky flavor. Really, conversation hearts were the worst, but somehow being with Hiccup made eating icky pressed sugar pills wonderful and good. She leaned into his side, pulling the Haddocks’ old afghan tighter over her lap.

“Ah, let me try again.” He selected a pink one and held it between his thumb and forefinger so she could read it.

“UR HAWT.”

“Really, if you want a pledge of my affection, you’re not gonna get much better than that.”

“Oh trust me,” she giggled, “I can feel the love.”

“Okay, okay, one more chance.” Hiccup rattled the box in his hand with a little shake. After a minute of searching, he chose a white one and held it out to her. She allowed him to place it in her open hand.

MARRY ME?

“Pff.” She scoffed a little quietly, trying to hold off a blush. “These are gonna get you in trouble.”

The entire box of candy was all at once dumped in her palm. Little colorful hearts spilled over her fingers, dropped into her lap, clattered to the floor where Toothless was curled up and sleeping. Astrid gaped, blinking up at him in shock. “Hiccup, what—”

His face was abruptly serious. Licking his lips, he nodded to her little pile of hearts.

She flattened her hand, causing more of the candies to fall. And in the center of them all, covered in a little sugary dust, a ring sparkled.


	25. Chapter 25

He pulled her up by her hair. In any other situation, she would have given him her fiercest glower and bent his wrist until it broke. But because she’d spent the last hour torturing him with with her hot, wet mouth, and because he was looking at her like maybe he’d burn to ash if he didn’t stop her— the sharp tug at her scalp made her lips part on an uncontainable moan.

“Knees,” was all he growled at her,

The low command sent a throbbing wave of heat through her blood. Astrid let him press her down and over the edge of their bed, his scalding fingers bruising her flesh as he parted her thighs none too gently. His skin was searing as he settled behind her, and then she could feel his hard length— still damp from her ministrations— teasing at her entrance. 

“Mine,” he rasped, and then he was shoving into her. 

“Hiccup,” she whimpered. She wasn’t sure if she was begging for more or for relief. Her fingers clutched at the soft furs, her cheek pressed firmly to the mattress. His teeth cut against her neck, leaving soothing licks against every bite that would leave a mark.

Her mate was a hard, unrelenting force behind her— a fury of snarls and whispered commands that never paused in his near-painful thrusts. He held the curls at the back of her neck tight, his free hand almost clawing at her breasts. It was ruthless. It was animalistic. It was rutting for the sake of asserting his dominance. 

And she loved every breathless second of it.


	26. Chapter 26

Hiccup was angry. She wasn’t sure when, but somewhere between watching him nearly single-handedly destroy the village every week and watching him rebuild it to be something better, she’d learned him. The way he glanced at the floor when he felt small, and the slight widening of his eyes that came with his sincere laughter. Tonight, it was the tension in his shoulders as he leaned over their dinner table.

Needless to say, she was a little perturbed herself. She was used to Snotlout’s flirting, though, and she’d learned long ago to brush it off. When he’d suggested— not for the first time— that she leave her boyfriend for a _real_ Viking, she’d rolled her eyes and left to take her dirty dishes to the kitchen. 

So she was aggravated. But Hiccup was angry. And she wasn’t used to that sight. His hands were placed flat on the table, on either side of Snotlout’s plate, and his head was ducked low. His entire posture was rigid and threatening. 

“—and I’m tired of it,” she heard Hiccup growl. The rest of the table was watching with stunned expressions, and Astrid blinked with her own shock as she slowed her steps. “She’s with me, Snot. Me.”

Her brows jumped. Astrid parted her lips, as if to say something, but her words stuck on her tongue.

Snotlout seemed just as baffled by this unusual display of protective hostility. He gaped at his cousin and leaned away from the table. 

“We’re not fifteen anymore,” Hiccup continued, voice like ice. “We’re adults now. It’s not a game. She’s _my_ girlfriend and she’s going to be _my_ wife. So keep your hands off and your mouth shut.”

Astrid’s hand jumped to her chest in response to the sudden gallop of her heart against her ribs. Her cheeks warmed, and she felt a thrill of odd excitement shake her. Hiccup wasn’t possessive, by any means. He knew she could look out for herself and he let her. He also wasn’t one to throw around words like _commitment_ or _forever_. She hinted at the future all the time while he nodded and answered vaguely. 

Fishlegs seemed to notice her first. He coughed, breaking the rest of the table from their stunned silence. Hiccup remained where he was for a long breath, scowling at Snotlout, and then he slowly straightened.

And then he saw her and startled. He made a halfhearted yelp that completely dissolved his intimidating air. “Ah— Astrid— ready to go?”

Her mouth tilted upwards at the guilty expression on his face. It only grew as he clasped his hands behind his back like a child caught being naughty.

Astrid raised a brow, folding her arms over her chest. “Wife?”


	27. Chapter 27

He met his neighbor for the first time on Valentine’s day, when they both stormed into the hallway in their pajamas. She reached the door between them first, though, slamming her palm against it in a furious banging. He could only watch, in perturbed interest, as this blonde fury smacked at the door until it opened.

Eret was a nice guy. Not a terrible neighbor. But he did have a bad habit of having the loudest possible sex in an apartment building with the thinnest possible walls. Hiccup watched as he swung the door open and— holding a couch cushion in front of his naked crotch— gaped at the blonde neighbor. “What’s all the racket for?”

“Do you know what time it is?” She hissed, hands balled into fists at her sides.

“Do you know what DAY it is?” He retorted, looking her up and down. “Give me a break, Astrid, it’s a day of love! Romance! Don’t punish me just because you’re in your PJ’s at ten o’clock!”

Hiccup half-his behind his door to awkwardly conceal his sweatpants. It seemed his neighbors already knew each other.

“I don’t care if it’s your wedding day,” she snapped back. “Keep it down, or next time you bring somebody over, I’m barging in pretending to be your wife.”

That seemed to sober him. Eret and Astrid exchanged a few more neighborly pleasantries, punctuated with some particularly colorful language, and then the door slammed shut again. The girl turned as if to head back to her apartment, but then she caught Hiccup’s gaze and stopped.

“Sorry,” she apologized, raking an embarrassed hand through her loose hair.

“Oh— no, I- I was gonna tell him the same thing.” He scratched at his jaw, giving her a hesitant smile. “Thanks.”

“No problem,” she replied. “I have a thing about Valentine’s day.” Her brows furrowed as she waved vaguely. “I hate it or something.”

“Me too,” he agreed. “Or something… I’m Hiccup. I moved in last month.”

“Astrid.” His beautiful neighbor pointed at her door. “Welcome to the building.”

He grinned, nodding. “Thanks. Uh. Happy Valentine’s Day.”

Her mouth finally cracked a wry smile. “Happy V-day, Hiccup.”


	28. Chapter 28

“This was all very thought out,” Hiccup muttered as he unbuckled his flight suit and laid the pieces out to dry. The shirt beneath sported odd patterns— it was soaked through where his armor left him exposed, and striped with dry patches where the leather protected him from the rain. “There was planning and sneaking involved.”

Astrid wasn’t as lucky. She dripped from head to toe, wringing her hair out as she watched the rain from the safety of a rocky overhang. Despite the droplets hanging from her nose and lips, though, she smiled. “You planned and sneaked for me?”

“Yup,” the chief sighed, overturning his soaked satchel to reveal the now-soggy lunch he’d packed. Food tumbled out. The loaf of bread splatted against the rocky ground with a wet squish. “Lot of good that did.”

Laughing at his surly pout, she nudged the puddled picnic aside with her foot. Then she pressed close to him, wrapping her arms around his waist. “I can eat lunch outside any day,” she mumbled into his warm, damp shoulder. “Getting to be close to you like this— it’s better. Way better.”


	29. Chapter 29

“This stupid thing better work,” Astrid hisses into her headset.

Her free ear is pressed to the cold metal of the museum safe, where the keys to the displays are kept. The other crackles with her partner’s voice. “It’ll work. As long as you get out of there in the next… twelve minutes, the alarms’ll stay disabled.”

She makes an irritated noise of disgust. “Twelve minutes. You couldn’t even get me half an hour, tech boy?” Beneath her talented hands, the safe’s dial clicks into its final position. The lock slides undone, and Astrid wastes no time in swinging the door open and snatching the ring of keys from inside.

“Yeah, well, if you would use the lock disabler I made you instead of wasting your time with the combination, twenty minutes would be more than enough.”

Astrid flips through the key ring. They are labelled by section, and she quickly finds the set for the ancient Viking displays. “What can I say? I’m old school.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Hiccup mutters from the line. “Have you gotten the safe open yet?”

“Yep.” She stands and takes off, boots making soft thuds on the expensive marble flooring. “On my way to get the stuff now. Be ready.”

“Bike’s already running. In fact, my ass is getting numb while you’re taking your sweet time, Old School.”

She smirks, even though she knows he can’t see it. “Don’t worry. After I get this dragon manual, I’ll find a way to make it up to your ass.”

He snorts in her ear. “Promises, promises.” Despite his words, there’s a playful note to his voice when he says, “Less flirting. More thieving.”


	30. Chapter 30

He’s not exactly sure how this all played out.

One minute a blonde whirlwind was throwing herself into the seat next to him and blurting, “There’s a twenty in my bra and it’s yours if you’ll sit at my table and smile for twenty minutes.” The next, she was lacing her fingers with his and explaining to a middle aged couple how he couldn’t stay long but was dying to meet them. It all happened very quickly.

“So. Hiccup.” The man sitting across from him smiles tightly. He’d raised his brow at him when he stammered out his name, and his beautiful kidnapper had looked at him like THAT’S the best you can come up with? “Astrid hasn’t told us much about her boyfriend. What do you do?”

Hiccup cuts a glance to the girl smoothing her free hand up and down his thigh. She’s beaming at him like her cheeks might break. That must hurt. “Uh, I work in prosthetics, sir… I make them.”

The older woman’s brows shoot upwards. “That’s interesting. Is there money in that?”

The corner of his mouth pulls upwards on a nervous laugh. “I do okay. Well enough to support myself… And anyone else who might come along.” Like crazy girls in restaurant bars that try to pass him off as their boyfriend. He gives Astrid a nudge that he hopes will come off as affection.

Suddenly nobody’s smiling anymore. The expression of the woman he’s pretty sure is Astrid’s mother has quickly gone from surprise to alarm. His fake girlfriend’s surprisingly pretty eyes have gone wider than their dinner plates.

“Anyone else?”

“Dad, it’s not—”

“Astrid, are you—”

“Are you trying to tell us something?”

Blonde hair whips him across the shoulder as she whirls to glower at him. Her teeth are bared in something like a snarl, and through them she growls, “Consider yourself fired.”


	31. Chapter 31

Hiccup lifted shaking hands to lift her bridal crown from her head. It pulled away with strands of shimmering gold, and Astrid’s eyes darted away before sliding back to meet his nervous gaze. Her fingers tangled in his and brought them around her waist to the laces of her dress. Then they returned to his shirt, disappearing behind the mantle his mother had thrown around his shoulders with teary eyes.

He fumbled the knot open, usually much more confident in his ministrations. But this was different. This was the first night of an eternity spent with the girl he’d loved for as long as he could remember. The gown loosened around her shoulders, giving way to reveal the round swell of her breasts. She helped him peel the bodice and sleeves away, until she was standing shyly— an out of character reaction— before him. It pooled around her ankles with the whispering thump of fabric.

He wasn’t sure that he’d understood what it meant for a woman to be beautiful until that very moment.


	32. Chapter 32

****

Hiccup doesn’t know how to read the blue lines stained across the little white stick. That’s not something he learned in college. But he’s pretty sure that most coffee meetings don’t begin with a NEGATIVE pregnancy test sitting on the table.

“Uh.” He can’t tear his eyes away from the thing. Should that be sitting by their coffee and untouched muffins? “That’s…”

“Yours,” Astrid says crisply. She hasn’t shifted her unreadable gaze since she sat down and pulled the test from her bag.

She looks so different without eyeliner smudged around her lashes and lips swollen from drunken kisses. She’s traded her skintight dress for neat slacks and her studded leather jacket for a light blazer. He hardly recognizes her with a smooth ponytail— it’s not the wild, sweaty waves that fell in his eyes while she leaned over his naked body. He wonders how she could possibly be the same woman he met on a crowded dance floor over a month ago.

His chest is burning. Hiccup realizes it’s because he can’t breathe. His palm slides to his sternum and rubs hard against the ache starting there. “Oh. Okay. Okay.”

Her blue eyes are like hard gems. Her frown doesn’t so much as twitch.


	33. Chapter 33

“Okay, class,” the Sensei began, his voice settling the murmur of chatter almost instantly. His class of fifteen or so students took an easy stance and turned their gazes to their teacher with prompt obedience. “I want everyone to meet Hiccup.”

The teenager in question waved sheepishly. The thick pads covering every inch of his body made moving difficult. He wondered if the uniformed people could even see the friendly smile he was trying to give them. Oh, the things he would do to pay for motorcycle parts.

“Hiccup is our new attacker,” the Sensei continued. “Since Mikey’s kneecap incident, his doctor has discouraged him from coming back to work.”

A disappointed groan went up from the group.

Nodding in sagely agreement, the Sensei put his hand on Hiccup’s shoulder. “I know, I know. But I’m sure we’ll have just as good of a time with our new classmate. Does anyone want to volunteer to demonstrate an axe kick as Hiccup’s.., initiation?” With this, he gave Hiccup’s padded shoulder a little shake and grinned. 

The class chuckled lightly. Several hands went up, and Hiccup glanced at the ceiling in a quick prayer. _Please_ don’t let it be the middle aged man three times his size in the corner. The one who looked like he could tickle Hiccup and still break his spine.

“Ah. Astrid. Come on up.”

The Sensei stepped away, and Hiccup scanned the group for just a second before a girl stepped out of her stance and towards the front of the gym. Relief overwhelmed him. The belt tied around her waist was striped, though he didn’t know what that meant. But she was petite and slender, and a bouncy blonde ponytail swung back and forth as she made her way up to him. She gave him a heart-stoppingly pretty smile and a quick bow of respect before standing across from him. 

Hiccup felt the side of his mouth pull rebelliously upwards. He bent in an awkward half-bow. He barely heard the sensei tell him to take a step forward as if to attack the girl— Astrid— but he nodded distantly.

Rushing her felt wrong. She was a few inches shorter than him without the pads, and he was likely twice her weight _with_ them. So slowly, he took a few steps forward, arms extended as if to reach for her. It wasn’t until he watched her pretty smile drop into a ferocious snarl that he realized he’d made a mistake. 

It was so quick he could hardly see it happen. Her leg arced outwards, and then her foot swung back hard against his neck. Even through the pads, he could feel the crushing force of the blow. The air was torn from his throat and lungs. He might have been able to recover if it wasn’t for the thick and chunky pads weight down his arms and legs. He toppled over like a shack beneath a wrecking ball’s swing. It was like he never even stood a chance.

The class erupted into laughter and applause, and Hiccup wheezed and stared at the ceiling. When he swallowed, the side of his neck throbbed with the bruise he was sure to develop.

A face appeared in his vision. The heart-stopping smile was back. Blinking dazedly, he watched her reach out a dainty hand of assistance. “Hi. Astrid,” she said with a nod. “Welcome to the class.”


	34. Chapter 34

“Hiccup, you’re gonna get fired if they see you doing this again,” Fishlegs whispered through the bars of the black panther’s cage. Even so, he watched nervously as the big cat handler squeezed in the maintenance door.

“And we’re gonna lose this guy if I don’t,” Hiccup replied. Adjusting his gloves around his wrists, he slowly stepped into the wide enclosure. “Toooothless,” he called, craning his neck to see above the high platform concealed by shrubbery. “Toothless, you sleepin’, bud?”

A dark shadow moved on the platform. The sound of claws testing thick wood scratched ominously from the corner. Then there was a black blur, and the panther leapt to the ground just feet from Hiccup. He hissed. 

“Hey buddy,” Hiccup swallowed, holding out one gloved hand in an anxious reflex. He’d interacted with this cat several times while it was tranquilized. He’d been the one to sit by his side while he was under anesthesia having his back paw amputated. But entering the panther’s pen was decidedly _not_ a thing he was supposed to do. “Just thought you might want a friend.”

The jaguar evaluated him with intelligent green eyes. Paced back and forth a few times. Then slowly, not all at once, he padded forward and sniffed the hand outstretched to him.


	35. Chapter 35

“Now this is genius,” Fishlegs whispered, scratching his chin as he leaned this way and that, inspecting Hiccup’s latest contraption. It was an odd-looking thing, a skeletal frame that fit over his head, and a series of colored glass shards attached to different arms that he could raise and lower in different combinations in front of his eyes. Frankly, it looked like something a madman would wear, but on Hiccup, it just looked ridiculous.

“Think about it,” the inventor in question began. He fiddled with the arms, switching them in and out. “We have so much trouble interpreting the Dragon Eye because of the different spectrums and magnifications. There’s only so many combinations we can keep active at once. But with this, not only can we make sure that we’re uncovering every possible bit of information encrypted on the lenses, but we can use the different colors to study the vision and available spectrums for dragons of different species!”

Before Fishlegs could respond with equal enthusiasm, there was a dull, “Wow,” from their audience.

The girls were slumped over on elbows and arms, clearly uninterested in the last two hours of Dragon Eye theories. Seated next to Astrid at the table, Heather watched both boys with a vaguely amused smile. When she had suggested a romantic afternoon lunch date, just the four of them, she hadn’t anticipated the guys spending that time gushing over the Eye and editing the dragon manual.

She lifted her shoulders, shaking her head at Hiccup and his bizarre multi-armed contraption. “You’re a nerd.”

“What?” Fishlegs objected, overlapping Hiccup’s protest of, “I am not!”

Shifting to face his girlfriend, Hiccup extended a hand in a request for backup. “Astrid. Come on. You think this is cool, right?”

The blonde lifted her head from her chin and squinted, tilting her head as if in thought. “Hmm.” She scanned him up and down, from the latches on his boots where his flight suit attached, to the slight magnification of one side of his face, which gave him a cockeyed kind of look.

It only took a second. She shook her head. “Nah.”


End file.
